How do I tell my wife that I’ve been sleeping with her mom for the past 3 months. It all started at her mom’s birthday party we were both pretty intoxicated and one thing led to another and she pulled me in her bedroom and start to give me sex. She is 41 I am 34 when she initially came on to me I was under the influence so unfortunately I didn’t turn her away I know I was wrong to continue to keep going back but her mom look like a young version of Pam Grier! I.need to tell my wife cause it’s killing me inside. Now the only thing that is stopping me is the text message I got from her mom a couple days ago saying she missed might be pregnant!!!!!! I don’t want to loose my wife or my family we have 6 kids together and been together almost 10 years. I know I did wrong and probably could never recover from this but I got to try somehow to make things right.

Signed
The man that messed up big time

You can find the full post in the Strawberry Letters Archive.

Dear Big Time,

**long sigh**  You can’t make this right.  You and your wife’s mom have betrayed her.  If you tell her, she may never recover from this.  Nobody deserves to be treated this way.  This is horrible, disgusting!  How dare you!

I feel a rant coming on, but I have to say this.  I am sooooo tired of people blaming their crazy behavior on alcohol.  You are 34 years old!  You know how you get when you have too many drinks.  That makes you just as responsible as her mother.  Not to mention that you kept going back for 3 MONTHS.  This leads me to believe that on some level you knew what your mother-in-law was doing the first time, and you liked it.  So you were not as drunk as you want us to believe.

People like you and this “mother” don’t deserve this woman’s forgiveness. You don’t deserve happiness because you won’t be satisfied.  The two of you have no morals.  You have disrespected your wife and your kids by doing this.  Now this woman may be pregnant!!! Really?!?!  You didn’t even use protection???  If she is pregnant with your child, this child will be your wife’s brother or sister.  Do you know how twisted that is?  This is sick, and the two of you should be ashamed of yourselves.

This mother definitely has some issues.  If I did my math correctly, she had your wife at an early age.  She had to grow up quickly.  This is not, however, an excuse to betray your child in this way.  This is so nasty.  I feel like throwing up right now.   A mother is suppose to love, nurture, and protect her child.  I can’t imagine doing this to my child.

You have two options.

  1. Stop sleeping with your mother-in-law and not tell your wife.  This is depending on the mother not being pregnant with YOUR child.  This also depends on your mother not telling your wife what has been happening.
  2. Tell your wife everything and take your licks.  Who knows.  She may want to stay with you nasty, gutter-bug behind anyway.  My guess is that she won’t.

Choose wisely… if you can.

~Jana

AskJanaLeigh@yahoo.com

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