I’m 23 and have been dating my girlfriend for about a year and a half. I love her very much and I’m 100% faithful to her. Lately, she’s been asking to have a threesome with another guy. We’ve joked around about having threesomes before. I never took the jokes seriously. I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t thought about it though, but I’m worried that our relationship wouldn’t last after a threesome. I’d love to try it (with a woman, not a man), but I don’t want to lose her. What should I do? –John
Well, John, you are right to be concerned about relationship. You’ve only been together for a little over a year. That’s not very long. This make me question whether she is happy in the relationship. If your relationship is not stable, a threesome will tear it apart. You’ll second guess yourself afterwards and wonder if she likes the other guy (or girl) better than you. Those types of thoughts will start a snowball effect and will grow into feelings of resentment. I’m sure you don’t want that.
If you feel your relationship can handle a threesome, I would set some rules/boundaries first. Keep in mind that a threesome is an opportunity to explore and try things you never tried before. However, make sure that your girlfriend knows what you are not comfortable with, such as being with a man as you stated in your question. Let this also be known to the person you choose to have the threesome with. Also, ask the other person what they like to do or don’t like. Maybe they have tried something that you have never thought of. Don’t be afraid to discuss what you would like to try. Boundaries are very important. They can make or break the experience.
If you would like to read more about rules of threesomes read this article from askmen.com.
John don’t take this lightly. Really think about this and discuss this with your girlfriend.
hmm.. this is a pickle. Sex exploration, in general, is good for a relationship; however, adding outsiders can potentially do more harm than good. I would suggest trying things that don’t require an outsider, but do what your relationship can handle….
I like your advice on this issue. You can’t treat this lightly.
By the way, I nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award. You can read it here: http://curiousqueendom.com/2015/12/03/the-versatile-blogger-award/
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Was wondering if you were able to work through this problem. I faced a similar situation with my fiancé and we get married in 3 months. The thing has been eating me up so badly because I am judging him. I need an advice from the experienced person and realize through them how I can come to terms with it. I’d like to ask the OP , assuming you guys are still together if those issues still keep popping up? If not, how did you deal with the matter?