For the last few years i have been caught in the middle of a very odd triangle with two of my very best friends. They are both very perfect specimens of men. On the one hand i have the single father with two jobs who spends his time raising his daughter, bettering himself and helping everybody around him. On the other you have the military man who helps everybody is as sweet as pie and just as caring. I dated each of them at differing points in highschool but life experiences took us seperate ways. We still remain the best of friends and they know about my relationship witht he both of them. Each has professed their love for me and told me that they can see us spending the rest of our live together (my self and each of the respectively) the problem is the single dad doesnt want us together cause he is afraid of hurting me and ruining the friendship, and th navy man is afraid that we have changd to much to work now even though we know we wold fit together. This leaves me in the middle anddeeply in love with two men. I am so confused at how i can find 2 good men when most women cant find one and yet i cant fully grasp either! Please help, Angel in love
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Dear Angel in Love,
I’m scratching my head wondering what you are confused about. Both men told you that they don’t want to be with you and have made no moves to take things to the next level with you. I hate to be frank, but they are just not that into you. It seems like they are stringing you along just in case they can’t find anyone else better. That’s why they keep telling you they love you and can see themselves with you. Yet, they don’t take things further. These men are dangling “happily ever after” on a hook in front of you, and you keep falling for it. Then again, maybe they don’t want to hurt your feelings by rejecting you out right, which is horrible, do they tell you sweet nothings (emphasis on “nothing”). You are all adults and should be completely honest with each other.
Angel, my advice to you is to break things off immediately with them. They are not helping you reach your goal of being in a healthy relationship. Since this has been going on for years, it may take a while to get over them, but you’ll be better off in the long run. Life is too short to waste your time pining over someone who does not return your feelings. Keep in mind also that “love” is an action word. If people love you, they will show you. I hope this helps.
~Jana
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