ex meme

You know… There’s a reason why exes are to be left in the past.  I even have a rule about exes: Do not call them for any reason.  Don’t ask them how they are doing.  Don’t ask them if they are dating anyone.  You will not like the answer they give you.  Then you’ll feel insecure and second guess your awesomeness.  That should never happen.  Let me tell you what happened.

I was bored Saturday, and all of my friends were busy.  What should I do?  I want to spend time with someone today.  Well, I’m scrolling through my phone when a little devil popped up on my left shoulder.  He said, “Why don’t you call an ex.  They will probably be glad you called.”

Hmmmm… “I don’t know, devil.  Things may not go well.  Plus, I have a strict rule about that.”

“Oh forget the rule just this once.  Things may go well this time.  You never know.”

“Maybe you’re right. Plus, all I want to do is hang out.  There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“Exactly! They are probably still single and waiting on your call,” he said with a grin.

“You’re right, devil.  I’m an awesome catch.  They will be crazy to turn me down.  I’ll start calling right now.”

Welp… The first guy pretended I had the wrong number.  The second guy said he was getting ready for a date.  (That hurt a little.)  The third guy was with his kids.  The fourth guy claimed to be busy at his biker club all day.  He was probably on a date.  I asked him, and he avoided the answer.

That did not go well at all.  The devil never did pop up again.  How convenient!  I’ll never listen to him again.  My ego was bruised (for a while), and I was second guessing my awesomeness. “Maybe I’m not pretty enough.”  “Maybe I should lose weight.”  “Maybe my standards are too high.”  Then my inner Queen popped up and said, “Girl, hush that noise! You are great just the way you are.  If they cannot see your worth, then forget them.” Never second guess your inner Queen.  I knew not to contact them, but I did anyway. Lesson Re-learned.  Do NOT call an ex for any reason.  Leave them in the past.